Somebody's in trouble?

Buses leave the San Angelo Coliseum grounds loaded with members of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints as the state continues for the second day in a row to relocate women and children who had been temporarily housed at the location in San Angelo, Texas Friday, April 25, 2008. (AP Photo/Tony Gutierrez)

SAN ANGELO, Texas (AP) - The state of Texas made a damning accusation when it rounded up 462 children at a polygamous sect's ranch: The adults are forcing teenage girls into marriage and sex, creating a culture so poisonous that none should be allowed to keep their children.

But the broad sweep - from nursing infants to teenagers - is raising constitutional questions, even in a state where authorities have wide latitude for taking a family's children.

The move has the appearance of "a class-action child removal," said Jessica Dixon, director of the child advocacy center at Southern Methodist University's law school in Dallas.

Constitutional experts say U.S. courts have consistently held that a parent's beliefs alone are not grounds for removal. More here:

That's right -- you believe what the state of Texas tells you to, or we'll come for your kids. We'll use words like "sexual abuse, Hitler, genocide, sect, etc" to vilify your ass, and nobody will peep when we grab all your children because of a hoax phone call.

I sure hope they use the "but everyone ELSE was pointing and hollering 'witch,' I just assumed they were witches -- you can't blame me" defense.

Authorities are investigating whether the calls came from a woman in Colorado who has a history of making fake calls, but CPS officials and legal experts say the outcome of that investigation will likely have little bearing on the custody case, given that authorities went to the ranch believing the calls were legitimate and then found possible evidence of abuse.

Evidence of "possible abuse." Not "Evidence of abuse" -- it's "Evidence of POSSIBLE abuse." Well then, that explains it. I sure hope they don't come to YOUR house.

I think I'm going to start calling "he/she has drugs in their house" information into the police and have them go and do thorough searches on the houses of libs. I can't quite put my finger on it, but something just isn't right about this whole thing.

Very creative

From Bits and Pieces:

Where were Sharon, Bobbie, & Diana

Genius Eagle finds new way to get food

From Bits and Pieces:

This video is 7 minutes long and he does it three or four times -- but you'll get the gist of it in the first 90 seconds.

First thing to do with lottery winnings

From Bits and Pieces:

Greedy Evil Rich must pay more

U.S. Private-Jet Fuel Taxes Rise 65% in Senate Accord
By John Hughes

April 25 (Bloomberg) -- U.S. business-jet owners would pay 65 percent more in fuel taxes to finance federal air-traffic control upgrades, under an agreement among Senate leaders. More here:

But don't worry -- those corporate fat-cats won't raise your prices to pay for it.

Bee tornado? Holy airborne pain, Batman

DeLAND, Fla. -- A giant cloud of thousands of bees mysteriously appeared and began to swirl in a "tornado pattern" around a Central Florida Mexican restaurant.

"A lot of people said it was bees and ran to their cars," restaurant owner Oxie Ochiana said. "It was scary. I was panicking. I didn't know what to do."

Witnesses said the bees began to swirl like a tornado and menace customers Thursday.

"I looked and it was like a tornado of bees just all around our parking lot, swarming," said restaurant worker Marie Olson.

A crowd formed at a distance to watch the cloud of bees.

"It was crazy," Olson said. "I was shocked. I was surprised to see it. I don't know where they came from, so it was amazing to actually see them like that. It was awesome."

State bee experts said the bees, which were moving from tree to tree, are now resting because they have formed two huge cone-shaped swarms in a tree.

Experts said the bees would likely move out about 24 hours after forming the cones.

However, Ochiana called beekeepers to remove the cones from nearby trees Thursday night.

What next -- is it going to rain fireants?

Media whore runs for congress

Peace activist Cindy Sheehan wants to snatch House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's congressional seat from her in November, but first she's going to need the help - and signatures - of 10,198 friends and supporters.

Sheehan was at San Francisco City Hall on Friday to take out papers for her independent run for Congress, but without those signatures from voters in the district, her name won't show up on the ballot.

"It's an uphill battle," said Sheehan, who vowed to run against Pelosi in July after the speaker refused to start impeachment proceedings against President George Bush. "But I'm excited about the signature-gathering process. It's going to be an opportunity to talk to people about our campaign." More here:

Hmmmm - are the people of San Francisco SOOOOO stupid that they will replace their very powerful (Speaker of the House) congresswoman with Cindy Sheehan?

Poor objective jourrrrnalists

MOSCOW (AP) -- Russia's lower house of parliament voted Friday to widen the definition of slander and libel and give regulators the authority to shut down media outlets found guilty of publishing such material.

The legislation, passed by the State Duma 339-1, is the latest attempt by the government to squeeze the country's increasingly embattled news media.

The bill allows authorities to suspend and close down media outlets for libel and slander -- punishment that is identical to that for news media found to be promoting terrorism, extremism and racial hatred.

It also expands the definition of slander and libel to "dissemination of deliberately false information damaging individual honor and dignity."

The legislation will be considered in two more readings before heading to the upper house of parliament, where approval is likely, and then goes to President Vladimir Putin for signing.

Putin has presided over a steady rollback of post-Soviet media and political freedoms. Major national television networks have come under the control of the Kremlin or its allies, and Russia's print media have also experienced growing official pressure. More here:

Yes -- in the US, we just bitch about idiot jourrrrnalists who use their "free speech" to deliberately mislead -- but the commies put their asses in jail.

D'OH !

SAO PAULO, Brazil---- Brazil's air force on Thursday suspended its search for a Roman Catholic priest who vanished after sailing into the air under a cluster of colorful balloons. The cleric's family chartered a private plane to continue the hunt.

The Rev. Adelir Antonio de Carli has been missing since Sunday, when he lifted off from the port city of Paranagua strapped to 1,000 balloons and wearing a helmet, an aluminum thermal flight suit, waterproof coveralls and a parachute. More here:

Friday pins

Nee

Found it at Fark:

Never mind nicotine patches - a DIY patient is using cigarette packets to cover up a gaping hole in his chest.

Rao Jiacang plastered the packets over himself after running out of money for crucial heart surgery.

Somehow he has survived for ten years, despite his beating heart being gruesomely visible through the paper folds.

An estimated one in 8,000 people are dextrocardiac - that is, their heart is not on the left hand side of their body, but slightly to the right. More here:

Penis-napper nightmare

KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft.

Reports of so-called penis snatching are not uncommon in West Africa, where belief in traditional religions and witchcraft remains widespread, and where ritual killings to obtain blood or body parts still occur.

Rumors of penis theft began circulating last week in Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of Congo's sprawling capital of some 8 million inhabitants. They quickly dominated radio call-in shows, with listeners advised to beware of fellow passengers in communal taxis wearing gold rings.

Purported victims, 14 of whom were also detained by police, claimed that sorcerers simply touched them to make their genitals shrink or disappear, in what some residents said was an attempt to extort cash with the promise of a cure. More here:

I can't figure this out

Excerpts - the rest here:

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Justice Antonin Scalia, in an interview to be shown on Sunday, defended the U.S. Supreme Court ruling's that gave George W. Bush the presidency and said he was not trying to impose his personal views on abortion.

Scalia was interviewed for the CBS News show "60 Minutes," an appearance timed to coincide with the publication on Monday of the book he coauthored, "Making Your Case: The Art of Persuading Judges."

In the past, the 72-year-old Scalia, who was appointed to the court in 1986 by President Ronald Reagan, has cited his "First Amendment right not to speak on the radio or television when I do not wish to do so."

In 2004, his security detail forced two reporters in Mississippi to erase tape recordings of a speech he gave. Scalia later apologized and said his policy was aimed at the broadcast media, not print reporters who record his speeches to write accurate stories.

Huh? But I see peeps on TV all the time yelling "turn off that camera" -- but they never turn it off. What's the call? I can't reconcile this. A Supreme Court Justice says "nay" and they have to abide --- a redneck says "nay" and who gives a damn -- next thing, Bubba's on TV -- bare-chested, pot on the coffee table, holding a beer, lighting a cig -- NOT surprised there's a cop in his effing house.

Perhaps it has to do with being "in public?" but surely his speeches are done "in public." What's the call here? Anybody have a lawyer friend?

Anyway, here's another small hint at what Justice Scalia thinks of the objective media.

And in 2006 when a Boston reporter approached him after a mass and asked whether lawyers might question his impartiality in church-state matters, Scalia flicked his fingers under his chin in a well-known dismissive gesture.

Also -- that guy looks gay to me -- just sayin'.

Man-crazy Miss Jane ??

Actress Nancy Kulp (Aug. 28, 1921 - Feb. 3, 1991), center of top row, was best known for her role as the spinster bank secretary Miss Jane Hathaway in the popular CBS sitcom "The Beverly Hillbillies" (1962-1971). A native of Pennsylvania, Kulp ran for Congress in her home state as a Democrat. It was 1984, the year of the Reagan landslide. She lost, and she lost a friend, too, after "Hillbillies" co-star Buddy Ebsen campaigned for her Republican opponent. Kulp came out four years before she died of cancer at age 69. She is pictured here with "Hillbillies" co-stars Ebsen, Raymond Bailey, Irene Ryan, Max Baer and Donna Douglas. (AP)

I found this at a slideshow called "When it was out to be out".

87 peeps who were in the closet.

Clear your heads

My friend Kevin sent me this in email


From a Danish associate

We in Denmark cannot figure out why you are even bothering to hold an election.

On one side, you have a bitch who is a lawyer, married to a lawyer, and a lawyer who is married to a bitch who is a lawyer.

On the other side, you have a true war hero married to a woman with a huge chest who owns a beer distributorship.

Is there a contest here?

Japan, cranking it up a notch

TOKYO, April 24 (AP) - (Kyodo)—Class hours and learning content will increase for students in primary school and junior high school in the 2009 school year, the starting year of the three- to four-year transitional period to the full implementation of the revised education curriculum guideline, the education ministry said Thursday.

In primary school, the weekly class hours will increase by one class hour at each of the six grades in the 2009 school year that starts on April 1 that year.

In the 2009 year, fifth-graders in primary school will learn how to calculate the area of a trapezoid, an item that was cut out in the current curriculum guideline. In the 2010 year, fifth-graders will learn how to calculate the volume of a cube.

In junior high school, class hours on mathematics and sciences will be gradually increased during the four-year transitional period. Third- year junior high school students in the 2009 school year will learn ions in chemistry, while those in the following school year will learn how to solve a second degree equation using the quadratic formula. More here:

The Klown lived in Japan for three years. The Japanese people treated us great. I consider it a privelege to have lived there and I loved the time I spent there. As I recall, the Japanese kids also had to go to school a half a day on Saturday.

Here's the kind of uniforms they wore while I was there.

Objective jourrrrrrrnalist

From here:

A biker is riding by the zoo, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion's cage.

Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents. The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back letting go of the girl, and the biker brings the girl to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.

A New York Times reporter watches the whole scene, and addressing the biker, says, 'Sir, that was the most gallant and brave thing I saw a man do in my whole life.'

'Why, it was nothing, really. The lion was behind bars, I just saw this little kid in danger, and I did what I thought was right.'

'Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a journalist from the New York Times, you know, and tomorrow's paper will have this on the first page. What motorcycle do you ride and what political affiliation do you have?'

'A Harley Davidson and I am a Republican.'

The journalist leaves.

The following morning the biker buys The New York Times to see if it covered what he did and it reads, on the first page: "Republican Biker Gang Member Assaults African Immigrant And Steals His Lunch."

Headline - Hippies donate cache

"The Grateful Dead, whose songs celebrated personal freedom, American idealism and mind-altering drugs, will donate a cache of their papers, posters and props on Thursday to the University of California, Santa Cruz, which plans to use the musical miscellany as part of a research center to be known as Dead.

Donating their papers? They must have all bought pipes.

Capitalism is a social disease

PARIS, France – Nicolas Sarkozy, the America-loving conservative, may be the new president, but he has some work to do changing the culture of a country largely in love with socialism.

The front door of the European news bureau of the state-owned Radio France displays a bumper sticker reading "Capitalism … the social disease."

Recently, a WND correspondent visited the impressive edifice of Radio France, located at the Maison de la Radio, a round building situated in the center of Paris.

All radio stations were nationalized when Nazi Germany invaded and occupied France in World War II. When France was liberated by the Allies in 1944, the new government retained a monopoly on broadcasting.

It was not until 1955 that the French heard any commercial, non-government broadcasts – at first only from the Sarre region of Germany, which had been freed from French occupation that year. Later, in 1981, President Francois Mitterand pushed the first licensing of non-state radio – though initially it was all subsidized by taxpayers. Private radio as it is known in the U.S. was unknown in post-war France until 1986.

Hey -- Marxist Frenchie jackass -- you think socialism is so damn great? All your little social "programs" so wonderful? Who do you think pays for them? Uh -- no -- it's not "you." The socially diseased capitalists in America pay for them.

I love it when broke-ass commie countries bad-mouth America and then demand free food and money from us.

If you (and the rest of Europe) had to pay to defend yourselves, you wouldn't have two marks to rub together you no-bathing ingrates. Never mind that though -- because French socialists can't think beyond the end of their long effing noses. One would think you'd get a whiff of humility walking around all day with those big honkers in the air.

We got so tired of you dumbasses surrendering we decided to go ahead and take preemptive action in defending you. But keep thinking you're oh-so-cool -- eat some more stinky cheese, brush up on your Arabic, and familiarize yourself with the direction of Mecca -- you know -- just in case the Klown becomes overlord.