Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Dumbass gets geography lesson -- then jail


A former military policeman is facing a federal narcotics rap after he allegedly sought to smuggle several pounds of methamphetamine to Japan in the form of 45 Snickers bars.

Rogelio Harris, 34, was arrested Friday afternoon at Los Angeles International Airport after federal agents discovered the narcotics in his suitcase during a “border search,” according to a felony criminal complaint. Traveling alone, Harris was headed to Tokyo on a Delta Airlines flight (and scheduled to return to L.A. three days later).

One of the seized Snickers bars is pictured in the above U.S. Customs and Border Protection evidence photo (click to enlarge).

Federal agents found the meth-filled candy bars inside a “box with a design printed on the outside suggesting that it contained Snickers candy bars.” When investigators unwrapped one of Snickers bars, they determined that the meth “was actually wrapped inside clear cellophane, which was itself coated in a chocolate-like substance so as to make the contents of the package appear to be a real candy bar.”

There was no tasty nougat, caramel, or peanuts to be found anywhere.

During questioning, Harris told agents that he last year received an “other than honorable discharge” from the Navy after testing positive for marijuana use. He claimed to be “traveling to Japan to visit his girlfriend, who lived in Hong Kong,” according to the felony complaint. When an investigator explained that Hong Kong and Japan were separate countries, Harris replied, “They are?” More here:

What can I add to this?  Anyone?  Anyone?  Bueller?

Ha ha, you're not fooling HIM lady - he's a genius

JULY 31--Suspicious that his live-in girlfriend was planning an affair, a Tennessee man confronted the woman after spotting a photo of an unknown guy on her Facebook page, according to a police report.

 Lowell Turpin, 40, “angrily demanded to know who the male was,” reported Anderson County Sheriff’s Department investigators.

Crystal Gray, 38, “replied that it was a picture of Mitt Romney.”

Despite being informed that the man on Gray’s wall was the presumptive Republican presidential candidate (and not some hunky, severely conservative sidepiece), Turpin apparently was not placated. Gray said that he “became upset because she was attempting to communicate with friends through her Facebook account.”

In a subsequent tussle over the laptop, Gray’s hand was injured as she unsuccessfully tried to stop Turpin form smashing the computer against the wall. Gray told deputies that Turpin, pictured in the above mug shot, also punched her in the face during the encounter. More here:

What's the matter, lady?  You couldn't find a brainless troglo-dumbass to date so you picked this guy instead? That's what you get for dating "Democratics."

Monday, July 30, 2012

The Klown gets off track on the Second Amendment


Below are some snippets from this article at Fox News:

Congress passed a 10-year ban on assault-style weapons that expired in 2004, but there has since been no real interest among Capitol Hill lawmakers to reinstitute a ban.

Ok, let's stop right there for a moment. From my point of view, anyone who uses the term "assault rifle" is one of the morons who wants to disarm you.  Oh, they SAY they don't ... but they really do.  They SAY all kinds of things ... and if you'll notice, most of what they say is intended to impact your life by enabling tyranny enacting legislation. 

The president was not specific about what measures he'd like to see enacted when he touched on the issue in a speech to the National Urban League. He affirmed his belief in Americans' right to own guns, but he singled out assault rifles as better suited for the battlefield.

"I believe the Second Amendment guarantees an individual the right to bear arms," he said. "But I also believe that a lot of gun owners would agree that AK-47s belong in the hands of soldiers, not on the streets of our cities."

Hmmm, there it is again ... the term "assault rifle." What other kinds of rifles are there ... fuzzy bunny, birthday cake, save-the-earth rifles?  Idiots.  What they call an "assault rifle" is just a .22 dressed up to look like a military rifle.  A military rifle is capable of full automatic (i.e. machine gun) where you don't have to keep pulling the trigger to fire another bullet ... but these "assault rifles" are not fully automatic.

Now the thing is, the second amendment was put there so we could fight the government if it became necessary ... that's it.  

They weren't thinking "we better put this in the constitution because the government might want to stop us from hunting," or, "we better put this in the constitution because the government might want to stop us from protecting our home."   No, they put it in there so we could protect ourselves from braying jackasses self-proclaimed geniuses who want to take away our freedom (for our own good, of course,)

So, think ... if they had full automatic weapons back then, do you think they would have excluded them?  I don't.  Of course, I think logically.  You see, they wanted a government which feared the citizenry, not the other way around.



So, according to the article, Justice Antonin Scalia was interviewed on "Fox News Sunday"and had some stuff to say on the topic.

Scalia, one of the high court’s most conservative justices, said on “Fox News Sunday” that the majority opinion in the landmark 2008 case of District of Columbia v. Heller stated the extent of gun ownership “will have to be decided in future cases.”

“We’ll see,” he said.
 
Scalia said exceptions to gun rights were recognized when the Second Amendment was written, including a tort that prohibited people from carrying a “really horrible weapon just to scare people like a head ax or something.”

Now, I have to tell you, as soon as I read that I cracked up ... because, a HEAD AX?  SERIOUSLY? LMAO.   I tell you I laughed until I had to wipe my eyes. 

So I started thinking about this.  I haven't done any research, but this seems to say that at the time the second amendment was written, there was a law prohibiting peeps carrying head-ax's around. Again, I didn't do any research to confirm Justice Scalia's assertion but let's just assume he's correct.  I'll save musing on the philosophy of it for a later time.

Anyway, it started me thinking about head ax's and I Googled images for 'er.



Ok, that's not really what I think of when I hear the term "head ax" (not that the term pops up in my conversations ... ever.)  But ... WTF?  Why the big/long extension?  What are you gonna do, ax-stab someone with that? What is the notch on the handle?  Some sort of grip aid?

I couldn't find anything in Wikipedia under "head ax" but I did find the following here while researching the images:
The most known weapon associated with head hunting of the Filipino tribes is the Head Axe. It is characterized by its specific blade shape with the long rear projection. Beside warfare, It was also used as a multipurpose cutting tool, worked in a very peculiar way: The long rear spike was driven in the ground, holding the axe in place edge up, and the cut object was drawn along the edge.
I still don't understand why this particular ax shape is so good for cutting heads and therefore I don't understand why they call it a head ax.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

World, meet Ryan Lochte

“This time,” Ryan Lochte said of his diamond-encrusted grillz teeth, “the diamonds are bigger so I can shine a little more.” 

Since 2004, Lochte has played Robin to Phelps’s Batman in the 200- and 400-meter I.M.s. He finished second to him in both events at the 2007 world championships and qualified behind Phelps in the 200 I.M. at the 2004 and 2008 United States Olympic trials. “I looked up at the scoreboard and they showed the crowd, they showed Michael, and I kind of smiled,” Lochte said.

It should be noted that Lochte was not wearing his diamond-encrusted grillz teeth at the time. That adornment came later, during the awards ceremony, when Lochte received the gold medal after making off with Phelps’s global mark. More here:

Hey Ryan, thanks for "representin'" America with your "grillz."  It makes me so proud.  Asshat.

The Klown is not a jourrrrrnalist ... but has some questions anyway


MISSOURI (KCTV) - At least eight Walmarts across Missouri have been evacuated Friday evening after bomb threats. Two of the stores are in the Kansas City area. Two and a half hours after the threats were called in, police declared the scenes as safe.

The Gladstone, MO, Walmart at 72nd and North Prospect Avenue was evacuated after police got a call of a bomb threat about 6:30 p.m. 

I see, so someone "called the police with a bomb threat?"  Did they dial 911 or did they use another number?

About the same time, the Raytown, MO, Walmart on Missouri Highway 350 near Raytown Road was evacuated for the same reason. Police said someone called in the bomb threat.

"Police said?"  Which police, the same police that received the prior bomb threat?  Again, did they dial 911 or what?

Kansas City, MO, police as well as Olathe police volunteered their bomb and arson K-9 unit to help at the Kansas City area locations. Officers found nothing suspicious and let everyone back inside the big box store about 8:30 p.m.

Media outlets in southern Missouri report that two Walmarts in Christian County have been evacuated due to bomb threats. Those stores are in Nixa and Ozark. Other media outlets are reporting the Walmart in Jefferson City was evacuated as well as the Walmart in St. Peters, near St. Louis. Just before 10 p.m., police confirmed that the Walmart in Piedmont also received a threat.

"Police confirmed?  Which police?  Too much trouble to Google the numbers of the police departments in those other areas?

Jefferson City was evacuated as well as the Walmart in St. Peters, near St. Louis. Just before 10 p.m., police confirmed that the Walmart in Piedmont also received a threat. More here:

Again with the "police confirmed?"

I would want to know whether all these calls came in to 911 which rerouted them or if they all went to the same police station.  In addition to that I would have asked police if they had caller ID on the jackass ... and further if it was the same phone calling in all the threats.

Of course, that's just some of the questions I'd have if I were a genius jourrrrnalist.

At this time, it is unknown if police are investigating the threats as being connected.

Right, because all these bomb threats against Walmart on the same day in the same state could be just a coinkydink  We don't want to jump to any conclusions about them being related, right geniuses?

Seriously, is it any surprise these libs are in a perpetual state of wonder?

Saturday, July 28, 2012

Clams are big fans of salt - don't tell Bloomberg

Friday, July 27, 2012

Racism, the libs love talking about it


It's a miracle - insane man regains sanity


SALT LAKE CITY (ABC 4 News) - A citizen with a gun stopped a knife wielding man as he began stabbing people Thursday evening at the downtown Salt Lake City Smith's store.

Police say the suspect purchased a knife inside the store and then turned it into a weapon. Smith's employee Dorothy Espinoza says, "He pulled it out and stood outside the Smiths in the foyer. And just started stabbing people and yelling you killed my people. You killed my people."

Espinoza says, the knife wielding man seriously injured two people. "There is blood all over. One got stabbed in the stomach and got stabbed in the head and held his hands and got stabbed all over the arms."

Then, before the suspect could find another victim - a citizen with a gun stopped the madness. "A guy pulled gun on him and told him to drop his weapon or he would shoot him. So, he dropped his weapon and the people from Smith's grabbed him." More here:

Gee, I sure hope the insane knife-man wasn't traumatized, don't you?  I'm sure the libs will see to it that he gets the help he needs so he can be released soon to become a productive member of society.  Too bad we can't release them all in San Francisco or New York City so they can get their starts with understanding and compassionate people ... who don't carry guns.

"Scientists" don't realize ... nobody believes in global warming


Strong summer thunderstorms that pump water high into the upper atmosphere pose a threat to the protective ozone layer over the United States, researchers said on Thursday, drawing one of the first links between climate change and ozone loss over populated areas.

In a study published online by the journal Science, Harvard University scientists reported that some storms send water vapor miles into the stratosphere — which is normally drier than a desert — and showed how such events could rapidly set off ozone-destroying reactions with chemicals that remain in the atmosphere from CFCs, refrigerant gases that are now banned.

The risk of ozone damage, scientists said, could increase if global warming leads to more such storms. More here:

Ha ha, they think we still believe in global warming.  Nice try, morons ... now get a real job because, as fast as I can, I'm voting for people who will slap your hand out of my wallet.

I love how these people use the government to get their hands on my money ... and then use my money to convince the government they need MORE of my money.  And the funny part is, no matter how much they get, it's never enough, is it?

Idiot libs find another problem unsolvable


SAN FRANCISCO (KCBS) – Bay Area Rapid Transit users have all experienced it; escalators that are down at their station. But what’s really behind the maintenance issues for the transit agency?

Officials said one of the main issues is the copious amounts of human excrement found in the escalator’s works, gumming up the wheels and gears. The bottom of BART’s stairwells often act as prime spots for the homeless to take shelter at night and in many cases, relieve themselves.

Last month, work crews opened up the broken BART escalator at San Francisco’s Civic Center Station and found so much human waste that they had to call in a hazardous-materials team.

BART police said there is little they can do about the problem as officers have to witness someone in the act to issue a citation. More here:

Right ... "nothing  we can do."  

Pay attention here folks because there are some problems the libs just cannot solve ... and it looks like "dirtbags shitting on their escalators" is one of them.  Yes, that and arresting illegal aliens are among the myriad problems that libs cannot fathom ... and it's funny too because they usually want to solve EVERYTHING ... you know, like how much salt you eat

Also, a citation?   What about an arrest for destruction of public property?  Oh, never mind, I forgot, logic is confusing to liberals.


Gasp, Hollywood dumbass overestimates his influence

Weinstein, an avid Obama supporter, cites lack of gun control as the real culprit behind the Colorado theater shooting and says it's time for Hollywood to examine its part in perpetuating real-life events. Harvey Weinstein -- the man behind some of the most violent movies to ever hit the big screen -- says it's time for Hollywood to address how violence in movies influences people.

"I think as filmmakers we should sit down -- the Marty Scorseses, the Quentin Tarantinos and hopefully all of us who deal in violence in movies -- and discuss our role in that," Weinstein said. 

This guy cracks me up. He thinks he is responsible for violence because movies are violent. What about books? What about plays? What about campfire stories? Don't think about that. It might take away from the self-important attitude of some Hollywood crapstain. 

But Weinstein -- an avid supporter of President Obama -- suggested the No. 1 culprit is the lack of gun control and said it is time for politicians to "put up or shut up" on the issue. 

Hey, Weintstein, bite my ass. Who are YOU to steal my freedom? It's never enough for jackasses like you. First you want to implement a few "laws" to control guns. Later you are mystified to learn that criminals disregard the laws. So what's your answer? More gun control. Idiot.

It may interest you to know that Aurora (i.e. hippieville) has plenty of gun laws ... so many in fact that nobody in the movie theater had a gun ... except the bad guy. So, nice job, gun-control morons. 

"Violence on the screen has increased tenfold. It's almost pornographic. In fact, it is pornographic. Video games are violent, too. It's all out of control. I can see where it would drive somebody crazy," Bogdanovich said. More here:

Out of control?  Out of WHOSE control?  Yours?  Mine? Gotta luv libs, they have a need to "control" everything.

Speaking for myself, oftentimes the violence I see in movies is so outrageous I have to stop watching the show ... not because I can't take the violence, it's because it's just so ridiculous that I can no longer take the movie seriously. I'm thinking "what mental midget can still enjoy the show after this bit of gratuitous life wasting?"

So go ahead, Mr Weinstein, have your big pow-wow with your big power-broker Hollywood friends. See if anyone gives a shit.  And stop trying to present a "young/hip" attitude by only shaving every few days.  Seriously, stop flailing ... take a shave ... and while you're shaving, look at yourself in the mirror and think of ways you can stop inflicting your idiocy on me. Thank you.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Strippers prepare for Republicans


With high-rolling Republicans flooding into Tampa Bay, Fla., this August for the party's convention, local strip club owners hope many of them spill into their champagne rooms.

The Tampa Bay area boasts more than 40 clubs. Some expect their business to more than quadruple during the massive, four-day Republican National Convention, WFLA-TV reported.

To get a leg up on the competition, some are adding special attractions to help entice GOP bigs.

So while top Republicans work the conventioneers during the day, a Sarah Palin doppelganger will be working the same crowd at night. A strip club called Thee DollHouse, which got a $1 million facelift in advance of the big event, has hired a look-alike - sporting glasses and her trademark updo - to entertain hard-working Republicans after-hours. More here:

It occurs to me that strip clubs everywhere (not just Tampa) could capitalize on this idea.

Idiot mayor of Chicago tries to punish free speech


This Thursday, July 19, 2012 photo shows a Chick-fil-A fast food restaurant in Atlanta. Gay rights advocates were surprised Thursday that the president of the Atlanta-based chain has taken a public position against same-sex marriage. Chick-fil-A President Dan Cathy said this week that his privately owned company is "guilty as charged" in support of what he called the biblical definition of the family unit. (AP Photo/Mike Stewart)

The anti-gay views openly espoused by the president of a fast food chain specializing in chicken sandwiches have run afoul of Mayor Rahm Emanuel and a local alderman, who are determined to block Chick-fil-A from expanding in Chicago.

Excuse me?  Isn't this the government punishing someone for their viewpoint ... for exercising free speech?

I mean, I can understand if the private sector wanted to punish Chik-fil-A by not shopping there or protesting etc ... but I cannot accept the government going after people for expressing a point of view.  Something tells me there's something in the constitution about this.

I guess nobody should be surprised though.  To me, finding out someone who was in Obama's White House staff is a communist with tyrannical tendencies is about as surprising as finding out about Pavlov's dogs salivating, capisce?

I sure hope Chik-fil-A doesn't sue the everloving crap out of Chicago, don't you? 

Liberals have a tough time learning


Shaun Tudor subjected a 10-year-old boy to a terrifying sexual assault, just minutes after being released from a secure unit

A clinical psychologist killed herself in a burning car after blaming herself when one of her patients sexually assaulted a ten-year-old boy, an inquest has heard.

Lisa Derriscott “couldn’t live with herself” after being told that convicted paedophile Shaun Tudor had committed the attack whilst on temporary, unsupervised release from his secure unit.

The 33-year-old doctor was a member of a large team that had approved Tudor’s two hour release.

When told of the assault, Dr Derriscott “obsessed” over it and became "quiet, distressed and withdrawn", the inquest heard.

Although the decision to release Tudor was not hers alone, she had quickly blamed herself and spent hours analysing her notes on the case to determine whether or not more could have been done.

Andrew Whittle, Dr Derriscott’s partner, said she had blamed herself for what happened "repeatedly" and had also talked of "not being able to live with herself" and "wanting to go to sleep and not wake up".

Her body was found on August 3 last year, two weeks after the attack.

The following day, Tudor, 43, pleaded guilty to attempted rape and sexual assault at Nottingham Crown Court.

He was jailed indefinitely and the judge said that it was probable he would never be regarded as safe enough to be freed. More here:

Really, judge?  Are you really getting your feet in cement here?  "Probable."  LMAO.

Well, at least this hadn't happened before, right?  Wait, WHAT?  It happened before?  With the same guy?

The sex offender, 43, who had previously assaulted a child while on leave from a different secure unit, was locked up indefinitely at Nottingham Crown Court. From here:

Gee, that's funny, the first article didn't mention that part.  I wonder why a Klown (with almost average intelligence) can find it by accident but it totally eludes a professional and objective jourrrrnalist.  How does that happen ... over and over and over again?

When are people going to come to the conclusion that psychologists are not gods?  Seems to me they're mostly full of shit ... and Tom Cruise agrees with me, soooo ....

Seriously though, I had some respect for psychology when I was a kid ... but it sort of ended when I found out how amazed they were that they could make Pavlov's dogs salivate by ringing a bell ... after they had been ringing the bell and then feeding them.  Who could have predicted this result?

And yet the libs are/were completely amazed by this and STILL teach about it in first year psych courses.  And whenever they discuss this great and significant discovery they all nod knowingly, puff on their pipes, and rub the patches on the elbows of their sport coats ... that's how you can tell they are geniuses.

So back to the judge who said that it was probable he would never be regarded as safe enough to be freed ... "probable." 

These days people are SO AFRAID to be "wrong" that they couch their language.  They use terms that aren't really specific so that a lawyer can't sue them later.  Ever notice how useless  "important" people do that?  That's why you get a bunch of non-sensical, double-talking crap out of public officials all the time. 

Lawyers have done so MUCH for the good of our society, don't you think?  I hope one day they get the recognition they so very richly deserve.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Watch a Liberal Convert to Conservatism Right Before Your Eyes

It happens at the 2:14 mark. Liberals would call this "being motivated primarily by fear". People with a brain would call this "common sense".

Genius "Democratic" uncovers Romney's true agenda ... racism


State Sen. L. Louise Lucas (D-Portsmouth), a campaign surrogate for President Obama in Virginia, said Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney is appealing to racists who do not want a black man in the White House. 

Asked on a Hampton Roads radio show why the former Massachusetts governor had been able to pull even with President Obama in a recent poll, Lucas said the problem was race. 

“Mitt Romney, he’s speaking to ... a segment of the population who does not like to see people other than a white man in the White House or in any other elective position,” Lucas said Tuesday. “Let’s be real clear about it — Mitt Romney is speaking to a group of people out there who don’t like folks like President Barack Obama in any elective or leadership position. We know what’s going on here. And some people may be afraid to say it, but I’m not. ... He’s speaking to that fringe out there who do not want to see anybody but a white person in a leadership position.” More here:

Well, you can't argue with that logic.  The facts are clear.  Many of the people who voted for Obama in 2008 have suddenly become racists.  Now why is that so hard to understand, huh? Why can't people see that?

Witch found ... stopped from competing in Olympics


ATHENS, Greece (AP) — Triple jumper Voula Papachristou was expelled from Greece's Olympic team Wednesday for her comments on Twitter mocking African immigrants and expressing support for a far-right party. 

The Hellenic Olympic Committee said Wednesday that Papachristou is "placed outside the Olympic team for statements contrary to the values and ideas of the Olympic movement."

 OOoooo, they found a witch ... it's a free-for-all.  So what did she do?

Papachristou's Twitter account ((at)papaxristoutj) contains several retweets and postings of YouTube videos promoting the views of Golden Dawn, a formerly marginal extreme right party that entered the Greek Parliament in the recent two national elections — in May and June this year — by polling almost 7 percent of the vote.

But it was her attempt at a joke Sunday that went viral. Commenting on the widely reported appearance of Nile-virus-carrying mosquitoes in Athens, Papachristou wrote: "With so many Africans in Greece, the West Nile mosquitoes will be getting home food!!!". Her tweet prompted thousands of negative comments that snowballed Wednesday.

Since anyone can access an unprotected Twitter account, Papachristou's YouTube links and retweets inevitably became known. Several of her retweets were original tweets by Ilias Kasidiaris, the Golden Dawn spokesman and one of the party's 18 Parliament members, who became notorious a few weeks ago for striking a woman Communist MP in the face and throwing water at another female MP during a TV talk show. Papachristou tweeted to Kassidiaris on his name day, last Friday, "Many happy years, be always strong and true!!!" More here:

That's right, if you make a joke about black people and/or support the wrong political party, they'll call you a witch racist and throw you out of the Olympics.

Fun spoiled for goat-man of Utah


SALT LAKE CITY (AP) - A man spotted dressed in a goat suit among a herd of wild goats in the mountains of northern Utah has been identified as a hunter preparing for a Canadian archery season.

After a hiker spotted the so-called goat man on July 15 in the mountains above Ogden, about 40 miles north of Salt Lake City, wildlife officials said they wanted to talk to the person to be certain he was aware of the dangers as hunting season approaches.

They speculated he might have been an extreme wildlife enthusiast who just wanted to get as close as possible to the goats.

Of course, I can see people coming to that conclusion, what with all the libs communing their asses off every time someone drops a hat.

A few days after the spotting, state wildlife authorities received an anonymous call from an “agitated man” who simply said, “Leave goat man alone. He’s done nothing wrong.”

This week, however, the mystery was solved.

Coty Creighton, 33, spotted the goat man July 15 during his hike. He said he came across a herd, but noticed something odd about one goat that was trailing behind the rest.

“I thought maybe it was injured,” Creighton said last week. “It just looked odd.”

He said he pulled out binoculars to get a closer look at the goats about 200 yards away and was shocked. 
The man appeared to be acting like a goat while wearing a crudely made costume, which had fake horns and a cloth mask with cut-out eye holes, Creighton said.

“We were the only ones around for miles,” he said. “It was real creepy.” More here & here:

Ok, this sounds perfectly normal to me.  Yes, put on some horns etc and prance around the mountains with a herd of goats.  WOO HOO, PARTY!  

And there he is, having the time of his life in a communing party when some dang hiker has to spot him and ruin the fun.  I mean, after all, who can foresee anything bad happening from this harmless bit of romping?

It's all just a huge coinkydink, right Santa?


LAKE BUENA VISTA, Florida (WKMG) -- A Walt Disney World guest who looks like Santa Claus was asked by Disney officials to be less "Santa-ish" because he was a distraction at the park, our news partner WKMG Local 6 reports.

Thomas Tolbert, who was visiting Disney while on a family vacation, said he was wearing "Santa-related" clothing but not a full Santa suit while recently visiting the park. Tolbert said people, including children, were asking for photos and autographs, something he said he's used to. 

"Do you approach people or do people come up to you?" Tolbert was asked.

"I never approach a person," he said.

Tolbert said he signed autographs at Disney World until a Disney representative saw him in the middle of a crowd. More here:

Ok, sorry, the Klown is calling "PERV" on this one.

Let's see, so this guy LOVES pretending to be a mythical figure to which children are attracted.  Now, if I were an old pervert and wanted to attract as many children as possible, what would I do?  Where would I go?  Disneyworld, perhaps?

Nah, it's probably just my imagination, right libs?  It's just me, jumping to conclusions using my super-power of common sense and rationale.

And LMAO @ whatever genius at Disney decided that giving this guy more tickets was a smart move.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Squander, squander, piss away, wiping their asses with your money


WASHINGTON (CBSDC/AP) - James Holmes, the alleged gunman in the recent theater shooting that left 12 dead in Aurora, Colo., was previously awarded a $26,000 federal grant.

WNEW News reports that Holmes was awarded a prestigious grant from the National Institutes of Health in Bethesda, Md. NIH is part of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.

It gave the graduate student a $26,000 stipend and paid his tuition for the highly competitive neuroscience program at the University of Colorado in Denver. Holmes was one of six neuroscience students at the school to get the grant money. More here:

LOL.  26 t'ousan' dollas.  Because the government can spend your money much more wisely than you.  These squandering jackasses need to be in federal prison.

When you think about it, this murdering butt-munch didn't have a job ... so where did he get the money to be buying all the weaponry etc?  Just wondering.  Anyway, it seems like the lawyers have found who is responsible for this ... and, lo' it's someone with deep pockets, not the guy who did all the Mcmurdering.

I know, I know, it's hard for you to understand, but that's because you aren't a liberal with shit for brains  genius.

Now you know what "Wet House" means


SAN FRANCISCO -- Only a few days into his new job as San Francisco's homeless czar, Bevan Dufty already has big ideas.

The former Castro District supervisor and erstwhile mayoral aspirant is pushing a plan for "wet houses," homeless shelters that don't force severely alcoholic residents to go cold turkey. Instead, drinking is permitted and monitored by staff members, who provide addiction counseling.

Wet houses share an underlying premise with needle exchange programs: If addicts are going to engage in self-destructive behavior no matter what, it's better they do it in a supervised environment, where some detrimental effects can be mitigated.

"The staff who gravitate to these types of facilities are ones who have specialties dealing with chronic alcoholism," Dufty told The Huffington Post.

Wet houses theoretically would woo hardcore alcoholics, now mostly outside the city's network of homeless services, into the system. They also would save taxpayers money. A study by the city Health Department found that San Francisco spends around $13.5 million per year caring for its top 225 chronic public inebriates.

"That means that we're spending money on emergency services, ambulances, shelters and jails, all of these ways that we're spending money that are not really productive and not having good outcomes," Dufty told CBS San Francisco. More here:

Yes, yes, I know, it doesn't make sense ... but that's because you aren't a genius liberal.  You cannot see the subtle nuance.  

No reason to fret though, a genius liberal will be along before the next bus to explain it all to you.  Oh yes, he/she will tell you what's it's 'about" and what it's "not about,"  Trust me, idiot-liberals can't go five minutes without using the phrase "it's not about _____, it's about ____."  In fairness, neither can many conservatives.

You know, I wouldn't mind a bit if a liberal applied his/her genius using their own money (or got voluntary donations.)  The trouble is, they always want to force me to give them my money in order to implement their genius.  Isn't that funny?  

In this case though, the taxpayer will SAVE money. What? You don't believe me?  Well just read the article.  That's another common thing about the idiot-libs.  They always tell you that if you don't voluntarily agree to give them money then it's going to cost you even MORE.

Monday, July 23, 2012

Some acids are just old and mean

Found it at the Futility Closet: More of Mark Heath's cartoons here:

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Many "Firsts" for our Illustrious Commander-in-Chief

• First President to apply for college aid as a foreign student, then deny he was a foreigner.

• First President to have a social security number from a state he has never lived in.

• First President to preside over a cut to the credit-rating of the United States.

• First President to violate the War Powers Act.

• First President to be held in contempt of court for illegally obstructing oil drilling in the Gulf of Mexico.

• First President to defy a Federal Judge's court order to cease implementing the Health Care Reform Law.

• First President to require all Americans to purchase a product from a third party.
...
• First President to spend a trillion dollars on 'shovel-ready' jobs when there was no such thing as 'shovel-ready' jobs.

• First President to abrogate bankruptcy law to turn over control of companies to his union supporters.

• First President to by-pass Congress and implement the Dream Act through executive fiat.

• First President to order a secret amnesty program that stopped the deportation of illegal immigrants across the U..S., including those with criminal convictions.

• First President to demand a company hand-over $20 billion to one of his political appointees.

• First President to terminate America's ability to put a man in space.

• First President to have a law signed by an auto-pen without being present.

• First President to arbitrarily declare an existing law unconstitutional and refuse to enforce it.

• First President to threaten insurance companies if they publicly spoke-out on the reasons for their rate increases.

• First President to tell a major manufacturing company in which state it is allowed to locate a factory.

• First President to file lawsuits against the states he swore an oath to protect (AZ, WI, OH, IN)..

• First President to withdraw an existing coal permit that had been properly issued years ago.

• First President to fire an inspector general of Ameri-Corps for catching one of his friends in a corruption case.

• First President to appoint 45 czars to replace elected officials in his office.

• First President to golf 73 separate times in his first two and a half years in office, 90 to date.

• First President to hide his medical, educational and travel records.

• First President to win a Nobel Peace Prize for doing NOTHING to earn it.

• First President to go on multiple global 'apology tours'.

• First President to go on 17 lavish vacations, including date nights and Wednesday evening White House parties for his friends paid for by the taxpayer.

• First President to have 22 personal servants (taxpayer funded) for his wife.

• First President to keep a dog trainer on retainer for $102,000 a year at taxpayer expense.

• First President to repeat the Holy Quran tells us the early morning call of the Azan (Islamic call to worship) is the most beautiful sound on earth.

• First President to take a 17-day vacation.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Dipshit Bryan Ross of ABC "News" UPDATED

When John Stewart and Klown agree on something, it's newsworthy...



Yes, yes ... totally objective mainstream media dumbass jourrrrnalist goes right ahead with the speculation about the Tea Party, and why? Because he HATES THEM SOOOOO MUCH, that's why.

But then the screaming communist jackass mainstream media jourrrrrnalist had to apologize when he found out (dammit) he was wrong. 


Now, what about the ACTUAL facts? let's examine this, shall we? 

Aurora Shooter Militant Occupy Black Bloc Member? 

Private Detective Bill Warner is reporting at his site that the Aurora, CO theatre mass murderer James E. Holmes was apparently a member of the Occupy movement’s “elite” militant and violent Black Bloc unit. There is also a photo on the site showing Holmes being arrested by what appear to be San Diego police. More here: 

How about that? I wonder if the totally objective, underwear skid-mark, Brain Ross will report that. Never mind, I don't wonder.

Friday, July 20, 2012

I have a question

Cornholio Ass-Nugget

AURORA, Colo. (AP) - A gunman wearing a gas mask and black SWAT gear hurled a gas canister inside a crowded movie theater during a midnight showing of the new Batman movie Friday and then opened fire, killing 12 people and wounding nearly 60 others in an attack so bizarre that some moviegoers at first thought they were watching Hollywood special effects. More here:

Let's say someone had "opened fire" in a crowded theater back in the year 1865.  How long would it have taken to bring the ass-nugget to trial, convict and execute him?  

Let's take the assassination of President Lincoln as an  example, shall we?  That happened on April 14, 1865.  John Wilkes Booth was cornered in a barn but refused to come out ... so they set the barn on fire and then shot him anyway when an army soldier glimpsed his dumbass flailing about in the flaming barn. 

Yes, can you just see that today?  A cop/soldier setting a building on fire when a suspect refuses to surrender?  Oh my Lord the mainstream media would go totally apeshit and call for the cop's execution ... never mind the murdering criminal.

Anyway, they caught eight co-conspirators within a week or two.  They then had a trial within another couple of weeks or so. The trial lasted for about seven weeks, with 366 witnesses testifying (that's about 52 witnesses per week.)  They were all found guilty on June 30,1865   Four of them got the death penalty and were hanged on July 7, 1865 (about a week later.) More here:

So roughly 80 days between the catching and the hanging.  And why can't we do that today?  Oh, right, because we're so much SMARTER than they were way back then.

Do you recall the Fort Hood shooting in 2009?  Has that jackass been tried yet?  Why not?  If he's convicted and gets the death penalty, how long will he be on death row  before his execution?

Do you think the death penalty can effectively function as a deterrent when the criminal knows it won't happen for 20 years ... if ever?

Do you think the speed of retribution has an effect on the behavior of criminals?  I think it's a huge factor ... then again, I'm only of average intelligence.  I'm not a big genius like the people who have allowed our system of justice to deteriorate to the point where mass murderers aren't quickly and severely punished.

If you ask me, the proponents of our current system need to be held accountable.

I noticed something

 

When a conservative has a good idea, he might try to sell it to you by telling you it will make somehow make your life better.  You might buy it or you might not.

When an idiot-liberal has a "good idea" that gay-ass-son-of-a-bitch will force you to buy it ... for your own good, of course.  And if you don't pay them, they'll put you in jail ... cuz you need to LEARN.

Sorry about the "gay-ass" slur but I recently learned that the mainstream media HATES it when you use "gay" in any insult ... they have FORBIDDEN IT ... so naturally I couldn't WAIT to use one.  Turns out it's kind of lame in a dumbass/teenager sort of way.  So I probably won't be doing it again ... unless the media intensifies its campaign.  I don't really hate gay peeps ... you know ... unless they're idiot-liberals tyrants.

Meanwhile:

"The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." Albert Camus

“There is no worse tyranny than to force a man to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him.” ― Robert A. Heinlein, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress

A good deal of tyranny goes by the name of protection. Crystal Eastman

“When the people fear the government there is tyranny, when the government fears the people there is liberty.” ― Thomas Jefferson

“A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine.” ― Thomas Jefferson

“No one is an unjust villain in his own mind. Even - perhaps even especially - those who are the worst of us. Some of the cruelest tyrants in history were motivated by noble ideals, or made choices that they would call 'hard but necessary steps' for the good of their nation. We're all the hero of our own story.” ― Jim Butcher, Turn Coat

“Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.” ― William Pitt the Younger, The Speech of the Right Honourable Wiliam [Sic] Pitt, in the House of Commons, on Friday, February 21, 1783

“We are not to expect to be translated from despotism to liberty in a featherbed.” ― Thomas Jefferson


Thursday, July 19, 2012

So THAT'S why they call it "The black death"

Terrible symptoms: The infection turns body parts black, hence the disease's traditional name, the 'black death'

A 59-year-old man is out of hospital after spending a month in intensive care due to infection from the bubonic plague. 

Paul Gaylord, 59, developed the symptoms after he was bitten by a stray cat his family had adopted. The cat, named Charlie, had caught a rodent which was stuck in his throat. 

It is thought that the rat was infected by fleas, which carry the disease. More (with pics) here:

Big dick causes delay


SAN FRANCISCO (CBS SF) – A man famous for having one of the largest penises on record told CBS San Francisco that he was recently frisked by TSA agents at San Francisco International Airport after they suspected he was hiding something in his pants.

New York native Jonah Falcon, 41, said that he was returning from a weekend in San Francisco on July 9 when he was delayed by TSA agents who became curious about the bulge in his pants.

“TSA didn’t know what to make of the massive bulge on my thigh. Even after I went through that body scanner that shows you naked,” Falcon wrote on his Twitter page.

“They asked me if that’s a growth – and i said no, that’s my dick,” he said in a phone interview with CBS SF.
More here:

D'OH!

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Did you hear about this? No? Gee, what a mystery.



All three evening newscasts on Tuesday and two out of the three morning shows on Wednesday skipped the dramatic story of an elderly Florida man who saved a cafe full of people from gun-wielding robbers. Only Good Morning America covered the story of seventy-one-year-old Samuel Williams using his own weapon fend off attackers.

News reader Josh Elliot lauded the "gun-toting senior citizen" for his quick action and for "not taking it anymore." Co-host George Stephanopoulos narrated the video: "There he is right there. Takes them on. Saves the whole cafe." Elliott praised it as "remarkable." He misleadingly described, "Williams does have a gun license and is not expected to be charged."

CBS This Morning, NBC's Today, as well as World News, Evening News and Nightly News all ignored the story.

A 2000 study by the Media Research Center found:
Morning News Shows Favored the Anti-Gun Position by 13 to 1. More than half of morning news gun policy segments (208) tilted away from balance. Of those segments, 93 percent (193) pushed the liberal, anti-gun position, while only six percent (15) promoted the pro-gun position. ABC’s Good Morning America (92 to 1) was the most biased morning show.
More at Newsbusters:

Mainstream media ... giving you all the news the intellectuals think you should have.

The government ... so thrifty and careful with your money


Hmmm, it seems the founders were well aware of the predilections of government.  I wonder how they knew.  Don't tell me this has happened over and over  over again through ancient history into "modern" times?

(CNSNews.com) – An audit conducted by the Energy Department’s Office of Inspector General was "unable to locate" $500,000 worth of equipment purchased with stimulus money by a recipient of funds distributed through the deparment's “Advanced Batteries and Hybrid Components Program,” according to an audit report published by the OIG. 

The DOE said it would not be "appropriate" to release the name of stimulus-money recipient where the $500,000 worth of equipment could not be located. More here:

If you didn't know any better, you'd write this off as "incompetent  boobs in government."  But you do know better.  The "stimulus" didn't stimulate anything -- except the bank accounts of the cronies of government.

And it cracks me up.  Nobody will stand up and say "I'm responsible for this."  Instead what do they say?  "We need to increase taxes ..."  Yes, the government needs MORE money.  Apparently they aren't finished "spreading the wealth" among their many donors, buddies and benefactors.

And what would have happened if a corporation had done this?  Do you think some people might go to federal prison?  Yes, I think they would ... but what about the politicians?  Do you think anyone will be blamed ... much less actually punished?


Meanwhile, do you ever hear them say they'll cut even ONE cent of spending?  Answer: No.

You know why?  Because all the money either goes directly to their buddies or it goes to a government agency ... and their buddies are running the agency/program (or working in the agencies.)

This is why I am no longer interested in arguing with idiot-libs over whose ideas are correct.  The bottom line is I want them to be free ... and I want them to apply their genius ideas to themselves and leave me alone.  Is that too much to ask?  

The problem with idiot-libs is ... they cannot leave you alone.  They are COMPELLED to enslave you for life. ALL of their ideas involve stealing money from other people (you) ... for their own good, of course.  And it's been that way throughout history (as Jefferson was so painfully aware.)

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Talk about "poor me"


From my friend Forrest in email.

Dog mystery


Airport Screening Results
January Statistics On Airport Screening From The Department Of Homeland Security:
Terrorists Discovered
0
Transvestites
133
Hernias
1,485
Hemorrhoid Cases
3,172
Enlarged Prostates
8,249
Breast Implants
59,350
Natural Blondes
3
              It was also discovered that 535 members of Congress had no balls

Sunday, July 15, 2012

John Sununu Changes His Name to Sunhahaha

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Number of Days Without Passing a Budget in the Senate.

How do you tell a Romney supporter from an Obama supporter?

Romney supporters sign their checks on the front;
Obama supporters sign theirs on the back.

Friday, July 13, 2012

I'm laughing so hard I canna think of a title


JULY 13--A man posing as a representative of the “America’s Funniest Home Videos” TV show tricked an 18-year-old Georgia woman into allowing him to suck her toe inside a Walmart in Georgia, police report.

 According to a Columbia County Sheriff’s Office report, the teen was shopping Tuesday evening when approached by the middle-aged suspect, who cops have identified as Joey Leaphart, a 43-year-old registered sex offender whose rap sheet is littered with foot-related crimes.

Most recently, Leaphart was arrested in February after approaching a female shopper at a Walmart in South Carolina and asking if he could kiss and smell her feet. Leaphart is pictured in the mug shot above.


After asking the teen if her toenails were painted, Leaphart said, ‘I know this sounds crazy, but have you ever heard of America’s Funniest Home Videos?’ When the unemployed woman said she had heard of the show, the man relied that he would pay for her purchases (up to $100) if she agreed to cooperate with a “prank.”

The teen then reluctantly agreed to Leaphart’s request to take a picture of her foot. “I know this is crazy,” Leaphart then said, “but can I kiss your foot?” Cops reported that the victim agreed “under the impression it was a TV prank.”

Leaphart then guided the woman behind a clothing rack, saying, “Let’s move over here so people don’t think I’m crazy.” After dropping to the floor and grabbing the woman’s ankle, Leaphart noted, “Don’t worry, I don’t bite.”

At that point, Leaphart put the woman’s big toe in his mouth and began sucking on it. The woman, investigators reported, “immediately screams at him to stop, and to leave.” Leaphart then stood up and, before running from the store, said, “Oh, it tasted so good though.” More here:

Lots of hysterical stuff in here for enjoyment.

LMAO @ " ... whose rap sheet is littered with foot-related crimes."

LMAO @ "... so people don't think I'm crazy."

LMAO -- "It tasted so good though." 

This guy is off the charts.