Friday, January 6, 2012

The new definition of rape

The Department of Justice has broadened its definition of rape to lead to more comprehensive statistical reporting of the crime nationwide.

Vice President Biden, author of the Violence Against Women Act, also publicly supported the measure. 

“Rape is a devastating crime, and we can’t solve it unless we know the full extent of it,” he wrote Friday in the DOJ statement.

Oh really, Biden?  "We can't solve it, blah blah ...."  So now we CAN solve it?  Wow.  And to think we've been unable to solve it just because of a few measly words in a legal definition.  Finally, we can put this whole rape issue to rest ... it's solved ... you idiot.

The new definition of rape is: “The penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim,” according to the DOJ. 

The revised definition includes “any gender of victim or perpetrator, and includes instances in which the victim is incapable of giving consent because of temporary or permanent mental or physical incapacity, including due to the influence of drugs or alcohol or because of age,” the statement added. More here:

Whew, no more sex with drunk chicks.  It's about time.  Our long national nightmare is over.

Let's see, I'm going to count how many times I had sex with sober girls before I was married. Ok, none that I can remember.  Does that mean I raped them all?  Or is it only going to be considered rape if the girl changes her mind in the morning?  I sure feel sorry for the kids coming up today.  I wonder how many will go to jail under this new definition of rape.

I wonder how long it will take for them (government and media) to successfully turn men who have sex with drunk women into witches.

I guess that's a new question for the cops to ask when they knock on your car windows when they're all steamed up.  Excuse me, ma'am ... have you been drinking this evening?  I'm required to find out so I can decided whether to charge your boyfriend here with rape.  I'll need you to breathe into this apparatus.  Mmmmm, hmmmm ... step out of the car witch sir, you have the right to remain silent ...

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