Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Unsuspecting morons tricked by subtle test questions?

So I was taking an online assessment the other day and it was so ridiculous that I thought I'd share some of it with you. These "tests" are all the rage in employment screening these days. Seriously, I wonder if they really help. I mean, how damn stupid do you have to be to get these questions wrong? You're telling me that an interviewer wouldn't be able to identify the moron who would screw this up?

Ok, we'll assume that this ability is beyond the capability of a "manager" and we'll go ahead and give it a perusal.  You're   supposed to check the box that applies.  Possible answers are:
HE - Highly effective
EF - Effective
N -- Niether effective or ineffective
IN - Ineffective
HI - Highly ineffective

LMAO - "Take extra change from the penny dish" -- yeah, that sounds like an awesome solution.  Hey honey, problem solved, I snagged 9 cents from the change dish this morning.  That idiot boss of mine is none the wiser.

"Hide a product outside the door to sell later" -- wow, that sounds really illegal.  I prolly won't get the job if I check that box.  I better pick another solution.  I like the "... keep it just this one time" option.

Well, these are what they are but one of them struck me particularly funny ... "Take surplus cash from the cash drawer ..."

"What?  What's the problem?  I only took the SURPLUS cash ... geez."


jules said...

I'd have to say for question one, stop working so hard will easily alleviate all financial problems I might be having.
Question two, I'm torn between asking all customers for money and taking the money as well as some from the drawer.
Question three, that's a no brainer, take extra cash from the drawer, duh.
Question four, well since taking extra cash from the drawer is not one of my options, but don't think I wouldn't write it in, I guess I'd have to say taking their valuable personal items would be the best decision.

Did I get the job?

WOMBAT said...

What you're overlooking is that they might be the type of place that only interviews morons so you might want to be asking yourself, "why am I taking this questionnaire?

wamk said...

You would be surprised what people would say during interviews. Way back when in my retail management days, I'd always make the last question in the interview "When is it okay to steal from the Company?"

I'd get answers like "If I asked for a day off, and didn't get it." and "If my Manager made me work too many nights." and "If I saw something in the store I liked, but couldn't afford."

And I'm with Wombat, by the way. If you aren't sure who the moron is in the room, it might be you..

A is A said...

Wow. I'm guessing this wasn't the Google employment test.

scot said...

The first mistake is in assuming that anyone truly taking a test of this sort can actually read. Are there really people this stupid out there? No wonder liberals are rounding them up in busses to dump them at polling booths: they're obviously too stupid to find their own way and how else would a person this stupid vote but for a democrat? It has always been a paradox to me that liberals see themselves as such intellectuals and superiors, yet they must rely on the most uneducated and corrupt to remain in power. Actually, it makes perfect sense.

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